Metric – Grow Up and Blow Away

I’m pretty tired, so excuse me if this isn’t up to the usual low standards of my subpar reviewing. I’m tired because I’m having difficulty sleeping in a bed with another human being, which might be a problem on our upcoming European month-long trip. Actually, it’s more of a month-long trip to Europe, but what do I know? You know how Sylvia Plath killed herself by sticking her head in an oven, right? I wonder if her face melted. I bet that would really ruin an open-casket funeral. It would have been funny if it did, and it did, but they did it anyway. It would have been the best televised funeral since Benicio Del Toro’s heterosexuality. Zing!

Just kidding, I don’t have any reason to think Ben Del T’s gay.  Why did I make that joke? Still an electro pop-rock duo that sound basically like Stars on downers instead of relationships, Feist and guitarist guy recorded this in 2001 or something, but it was never released because of that year’s spider outbreak. Which is a shame, because it’s pretty good! A bunch of synth-heavy shiny pop songs by a coupla kooks, livin’ in Toronto or New York, being kinda sad. It’s about as consistent as a band working in this terrible genre can get! Which is to say it could really use some cleaned up production and real drums. It’s a good time for all, especially the still-solid title track. wavering “Parkdale,” FInal Fantasy victory music instrumental “Fanfare,” and hook-laden “Torture Me.” Sure the good songs are front-loaded, and it gets a bit repetitive with all the mid-tempo pop songs (sometimes half the album feels like poor man’s “Torture Me”‘s), but the kids really know their way around a good synth tone and/or quirky vocal line. Plus, Feist’s voice remains one of the most enjoyable in modern music, so how can you go wrong?

Oh wait, I know! Because you can’t buy it? Because they’d only release it years later without three of its best songs? Grow Up and say ‘oy vey!’ Right, Jews? I think so! But more on that later!

Also, “Rock Me Now” is terrible Martini-bar-background-music garbage.

7/10

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